If someone asked me if I had a blast during my first year in medical school, I'd say everything good happened...
except that I had no one to really share it with.
Tonight after winning best short film, best film directing, best film editing, and best cinematography... I'm actually very upset that I wasn't the one to take the prize. It's not that I'm so attention hungry and I want everyone to know my name. But I feel that I deserved it and whoever went to claim that prize should have let me.
And now instead of eating out and celebrating, the girls decided to segregate me once more.
And I go back to my usual routine: eating alone, sitting alone, studying alone, and being left out of almost every single occasion.
I guess I never truly made friends here in medical school. So the answer is no, I didn't have a blast. I spent my first year alone wishing someone would see value in me as a person and the friend that I am.
But that one person who sees me, and only me, from the sea of Indonesian faces... I wish you were a girl. Maybe people would stop giving us shit if you were my best friend instead of my boyfriend.